Today turned out pretty wonderfully, I must say. Lately, my love-hate relationship with my job really has been an every-other-day thing.

I love my job every other day. I hate my job every other day.

Except that I never really hate my job. I dislike some of the staff members sometimes. I dislike the weird politics that take place every so often. Occasionally, I want to slap some of our customers like nobody's business. But I don't hate it. Not really.

Yesterday was an I-Love-My-Job day. I felt like part of the team. Office Guy was back (he'd been sick) and he and I chatted for a while. He's cool, easy to talk to and joke with. Ellen was being super nice to me and I felt really included in the important conversations taking place throughout the day. I'm planning to go to her Halloween party and I got to hold her baby daughter, who I adore. Summer even squeezed my arm and smiled at me as she passed me. And I got sandwiches for everyone from the cheese shop! It felt like old times.

Yesterday, I was so proud of myself and so happy, because I got through an eight hour shift. I did it! And I wondered why I ever thought of looking for another job. Maybe I really can do this, after all, I found myself thinking.

This morning I woke up and my inner dialoque sounded just like a character from The Sopranos. And I'm not just talking about swearing, I mean the New York accent and everything. Maybe because I watched the show last night? I don't know; it was just weird!

As I drove to work this morning, my feet ached, my body itched (most likely from anxiety), and I couldn't help doubting I'd make it through the day. I told myself I'd aim for a half-day, and go from there.

I worked and cleaned and walked dogs. By the way... Apparently, everyone decided they over-reacted the other night and it's apparently not necessary to get all dolled up for Hunter. After all that!

Anyway, at about 11:30am, I started slowing down. I kept taking breaks. It got to the point where I was taking a 5 minute break after every 7 minutes I spent standing! I couldn't do it anymore... I was about to say to Renni, "I need to go home," when she beat me to the punch.

"You're in pain," she said.

"Yes, I am."

"You can't walk dogs."

"I was thinking the same thing. I think I need to go home," I told her.

"I better start walking dogs then!" she said with a smile. Then she added, "I hope you feel better!"

Renni is nice.

So I drove home, and cried a little on the way, out of frustration with not being able to work properly or even stand for very long. And because I'm confused about what to do regarding my job. And because I physically hurt.

I got home, changed into my favorite pajamas and cooked some Asian Noodle Stir-Fry, courtesy of Amy's Cuisine frozen foods. Mmmm, stir fry....

And as I was finishing eating, the phone rang. My immediate paranoid thought was that it was my boss calling! But then, lo and behold, the caller ID revealed a very pleasant surprise!! It was Fey! Fey and I have been playing phone tag for a while now, and I'd been thinking about her.

So I picked up and we talked and talked and talked. I can't believe how much we talked! It was SO cool!! I love talking with fellow chatterboxes! We talked a lot about pets, animals in general, a little about work, the universe, you know... all the essentials of a great conversation! I'm also happy that she gave me some really good insight about karma, and that now I have a better grasp on the concept than I did. I love how she puts things in perspective. And I love the words she uses when she speaks and writes. One of my favorite things is when people can paint vivid word pictures in my head, and she can definitely do that! In fact, she's the only person who can make me miss Washington simply by the way she describes it! I didn't really enjoy living there, and I'm not sure if I ever would again, or if I'd ever get used to that grey climate. I'm more of a California girl, I think...

Anyway, I had so much fun talking and laughing with her that it brightened my whole day. I feel like the day worked out perfectly! Got in a funk, went home early, just in time to catch a great gal's phone call and spend the afternoon laughing and chatting with her, a friend I feel like I've known forever. I find conversations like that really rejuvenating, personally!

Now I feel like I'm in a better frame of mind (I almost spelled that phrame of mynd!) to problem-solve, regarding my work situation. Maybe if I can figure out a decent schedule with my boss, and not work the day shifts. Or maybe... Well, I won't think it all out on screen just yet. I've got some thinking to do in my head, first!

And that's how it stands for now. I'm grateful today turned out so well. Considering how it started, I think it ended rather well, don't you?

~meg~