Why do people have to be dicks? Seriously. I just got home. It's the end of a long day, and I wanted to call the "sweet little old lady" back whose cat needs cat-sitting. Bobbi is the one who told me a sweet little old lady would be calling me. She refers pet-sitting folks to me whenever she'll be out of town. Because Bobbi rocks.

And Bobbi was not wrong. She is a sweet little old lady. However, Bobbi did not mention (and, I'm assuming, did not know) that the sweet little old lady (SLOL) has a husband who is a complete and utter jerkwad.

This was our conversation:

Me: May I speak to SLOL?

Nice Man: May I ask who's calling, please?

Me: Yes, this is Meghan, I'm returning her call about petsitting.

Suddenly Angry Jerkwad: What?

Me: Petsitting. Catsitting. For her cat. (waiting for response)

SAJ: (after a pause, in a very angry and condescending tone) So let's see. You're either trying to sell something, offer us something we don't want or need, or otherwise get us to give you money somehow, isn't that right?

Me: (taken aback) Uh, no... She called me earlier to ask if I could--

SAJ: (interrupting me) Did she ASK you to call her back??

Me: (getting pretty pissed off, myself) Yes. She did.

SAJ: Oh. One second.

Then SLOL comes on and is as sweet as can be. She calls me "dear," and apologizes for her husband, saying, "He thought you were trying to sell us something, you know, how people do during dinner..."

And to that I say... Unless you know who is on the other line, and you want to speak to that person, why on earth would anyone actually ANSWER the phone during dinner? You're eating! Don't pick up the phone!! And damn me for not knowing when you eat dinner, for chrissakes. I eat dinner at 8:30 or 9:00. Or whenever I get hungry. My mom eats dinner at 5:00. So when IS dinner time anyway?? I was under the impression I was being courteous by returning her call the same day she called me rather than waiting until the next morning. Apparently, I was wrong! Next time, I'll reconsider. Jiminy Christmas.

Somewhere in the course of SLOL's and my conversation, she did say, "Oh, my husband says to tell you he apologizes."

"Oh. Thank you," was all I could think to say.

I must say, I'm getting very good at not saying, "It's okay," when I don't think it is. Bravo to me. It's taken me an ass-long time to learn to do that, and it feels good to finally implement this behavior.

Because damn it, it's not okay. It's just not.

What if I were a telemarketer? What if I were trying to sell something? I didn't say a single rude thing, or have a smarmy tone to my voice. What gives anyone the right to talk down to others like that?

I know people don't like being hassled, or being sold stuff. I hate it, too! I hate it when I'm at the mall, walking by those unavoidable kiosks in the middle of all the stores I actually want to shop at. At that point, people are physically coming at me with their "cool" products saying, "Hi, would you like to try a--?" And yes, it's obnoxious, but you know what I do? I say, "No, thanks." And keep walking. Because there's no need to get all up in their face about it. If they're rude to me after that, then all bets are off. Otherwise, why freak out? You know what I'm saying?

When it comes to actual telemarketers, there are a few solutions I can think of:

1) The Preferred Method: Get Caller ID. How hard is that? And what is it, like $5 per month now? And when you have Caller ID, if you don't recognize the number, don't pick up!

2) Have an answering machine and screen your calls.

3) Turn OFF your ringer during dinner, if it pisses you off so much!

4) If you're actually somehow on the line with a telemarketer (and if you follow any of the above three suggestions, that's highly unlikely), say, "I'm sorry to interrupt you, but I'm not interested." At that point, they'll either hang up without saying good-bye, or they'll say, "Okay, thank you," and hang up. OR, they'll be assholes and keep talking, in which case, YOU hang up. No matter what, you're no longer talking to them and you haven't just been a total dick.

The other thing that gets me is that people are being rude to others who are simply doing their jobs. Some people have the unfortunate job of being telemarketers. Maybe they don't love that job, and maybe it wasn't their first choice, but you know what? It puts food on the table. In fact, it pays pretty decent money, because not many people want it. Why? Because people like Jerkwad treat telemarketers like dirt! I mean, is it just me? Am I alone here? I just don't see the point of being rude to people for no sound reason. What happened to common courtesy and decency and other words ending in "see" sounds??

So hey, listen up, all you people out there! Take it easy on those telemarketers, will ya? And while you're at it, please be kind to your pet-sitters. I'm sure someone out there will appreciate it. At any rate, I will, and maybe, hopefully, that counts for something.