I am loving reading everyone's accounts of JournalCon. Especially cool is knowing what a few people actually sound like after having met them over the weekend and being able to hear their voices in my head as I read their entries.

However, I feel a little strange, because I don't feel like I have anything poignant to say about the whole experience of JournalCon this year. Unlike some of this year's attendees who are writing very cool stuff!

Last year was my very first JournalCon and being around such a wide variety of happy, friendly people made me realize that I'm not so alone in the world, that I possibly don't suck, that I don't have to pigeonhole myself into one category, that I can just be me, and that there are people in the world who will accept me for who I am. Yeah, I got all that from a weekend of boozin' it up with webgeeks!

And in the past year, I have felt a lot better about myself. I can tell from reading over past entries that my confidence and my self esteem has been growing steadily, and I think that's majorly cool.

So what did I take away from JournalCon this year? Well, something completely different, of course.

I realized that I was surrounded by strangers, yet felt very comfortable. I realized that when I didn't feel at ease, a beer was all it took for me to be all chatty and casual again. I saw for the millionth time in my life the importance of being around people who bring out the best in me, who allow me the space to relax, open up, and have fun. I've been getting better about choosing people like that to associate myself with, and for that, I'm glad. I used to latch onto people who brought out the worst in me, and that's no way to live.

The other thing I got all introspective about was my own writing. I have trouble with it sometimes -- expressing my feelings, wondering whether or not to censor certain events or certain thoughts I'm having... Wondering who I'm writing for, and if I want to continue with it or not. I often feel inadequate when reading other peoples' writing, and more, I wonder if anyone's interested in what I have to say.

But after JournalCon, I feel a lot better about all of it. Omar said if you're writing online, you're writing for an audience. And that struck a chord with me, because I have very few readers! But I realized I care about having more readers, I care about whether or not readers enjoy my words, and somewhere in that train of thought, it occurred to me that I want to share these words with more people. The only reason I haven't done so is I've been scared of being judged, scared of offending someone inadvertently... just, scared. But that's certainly not a healthy way to look at things! So I've decided to go for it, to share this site with whomever I feel comfortable, and that includes my family. Read away, little audience of mine. I hope you like what's here!

I suppose the only other things bouncing around in my head about JournalCon are the things I feel dorky about, and the little moments I want to remember.

Things that made me feel dorky:

Feeling too shy to say hi to folks I thought were cooler than me. Followed by not actually having time or another chance to introduce myself! So now JournalCon is over and I never said hello to Melissa.

Possibly worse is being near people and not realizing who they were until later. I think ejshea is a super cool site, and was standing like, right next to Erin for a little bit, not saying a word, because someone else was chatting with her and I had no idea she was ERIN from ejshea.com! Same with Mary. I talked to her for all of two seconds, not realizing she was the lady from Fly in the Honey!

So if you're reading, Melissa, Erin, and Mary: I love your sites, and I think you're all fabulous!

Okay, I'm done. Onto the memorable moments:

Pineapple Girl grabbed my ass on karaoke night! Yeah, that's right. Jealous? Hee!

Two of The Ususal Suspects introduced themselves to me, AmyD and Shawn. They were both not only totally nice, but the fact that they recognized my name made me feel awesome and all, like, important and stuff. I didn't know anyone on the TUS board ever noticed when I posted!

At different times, chatting with ThatGrrl and Robbie. Very cool folks. There were plenty of others, too, but I think (I hope) I mentioned most of them in the first round.

Signing Rachel's little travel journal. I was the first one she asked to sign it! Woo!

Talking very briefly with Beth, Sundry, Christina, and Kim Holzer.

Sharing a chair with Emily before I left on Sunday, getting a big hug from her, and her calling me "roomie" again. Just like last year! Emily r0x0rs.

Damn, I just LOVE everyone I spent time with! JournalCon really is one of the coolest events ever. I am already looking forward to next year!