A lot of stuff is on my mind right now. I feel like thoughts are just whirring around in my head, like a blender on high, except I don't even get a tasty smoothie at the end of the day. Ooh, smoothie. That's a good idea.

Anyway, I feel worn out. I'm having a conflict in my head - to be sad or not to be sad. Some friends of mine are going through some really tough times. All separate friends, dealing with health scares, or bad news in general. Not at all related to one another. And it just gets to me, I guess. I want to help, to reach out, to be there, to do something. I want to make it all better. I want my friends to be okay. I have no idea how to react to their news or what to do, other than just be there if they need me. And to be okay with the idea that they might not. I feel pretty helpless, actually, which is the worst part of it all.

As for my own life, things are going pretty well. This, in turn, makes me feel kind of weird and maybe even slightly guilty. Why is that? I know I'm not the only one who feels guilty when their life is great, but friends are struggling. Isn't that strange, though?

So anyway, first and foremost on the brain is moving, of course. We are in desparate need of a plan. I guess we kind of have a plan. I just wish everything could happen faster. Why can't I wave a wand and have all my stuff packed?

Joe and I also need to go apartment hunting. I'm kind of looking forward to this, but kind of nervous about it, too. It's always nerve-wracking/exciting to look for a new home. I hope we find someplace we like, and can afford!

Part of my plan is to go through all my stuff and ask myself, "Self, do I want to move with this AGAIN?" I plan on getting rid of lots of things. Half.com, here I come!

My allergies are not helping the muddled, yet crazed, feelings in my head, either. They've been so great (read: nonexistant) for so long. Today I'm dealing with a post nasal drip/sore throat extravaganza, which is just so sexy.

In spite of my feeling a little crappy this evening, I did have a fabulous day. I went horse riding this morning, which was exceptionally fun. So fun, in fact, that I'm thinking of using another letter to write about my adventure, even though I already wrote about the horses this month.

I think I'll do that. Not tonight, though. Tonight is a night for sleeping soundly, and, gods willing, waking up feeling refreshed. I'm hoping sleep will clear away a little bit of the clutter in my head as well as my sore throat and congestion. Otherwise, you'll be reading about Z for Zyrtec in the near future.