The good news is that my allergies are, as I'd hoped, essentially nonexistant. I really do seem to have outgrown them almost completely.

The bad news is, I have a cold. Yes, that's right. That sore throat and sinus congestion stuff wasn't just a case of pollen overexposure. I am sick. And being sick is the suck. (Say that three times fast!) I am tired and irritable, but still well enough to feel guilty for feeling like such a whiny crybaby over the whole thing. All I want to do is sleep. And I've done quite a bit of that. Also, I keep craving orange juice. My lovely husband surprised me by coming home with McDonald's breakfast this morning, complete with... yes, a large orange juice (which all turned out to be surprisingly delicious!)! I would have kissed him if I weren't all germ-ified over here.

Joe and I then spent some time kicking ass as superheroes. He is still kicking ass. I am just sitting around feeling kind of icky.

Okay, enough. No more sick-talk. Time to tell you about the horsies...

I met up with E. on Thursday morning to go horseback riding. The horses had been moved to a different pasture to graze somewhere else. It was actually easier to get to than the last one. Or so it seemed. "They should be just up the hill," E. said. So, up we climbed! And up, and up, and UP. My calves were burning, as I stood still, panting for air, while E. walked around calling the horses' names.

"They must be up a little higher," she said. "Sorry!"

"It's okay," I said, hoping the horses were right around the corner. But no. We climbed some more. And then a little more. And then I slipped in the dirt just slightly. And regained footing on some tree roots. And then we climbed even higher, until I forced my breath to form the words, "E., I'm gonna stop again," while I laid my full body's weight against a tree. We were at such a steep incline, that the tree just held me up. I felt like I was lying down on it, while standing. (As if that makes any sense.) As I lay there, I could actually feel my heartbeat booming throughout my entire torso. It was as if my heart had grown fifty times its size and pulsed throughout my body. I've never felt my pulse in my back before!

E. went up a bit higher, and called back to me, "Oh they're right here!"

I followed the sound of her voice and climbed the last leg of this crazy hill to get to the horses. Inside my head, I vowed never to keep horses in hilly areas if I'm ever lucky enough to have any of my own.

And then, there they were! A big herd of horses, all standing around together. I put Heather's halter on, while E. did the same for Gracie. And now it was time to go back down the hill. Lovely. I was terrified, but the walk down was actually a bit easier. We had to back up at one point, retracing our steps to take the horses on the most level path possible. I am shocked at what a small space horses need in which to turn completely around. Shocked. "Wow, Heather, you rock," I told the horse as she turned the opposite direction and began following me again.

At the bottom of the hill, the entire back of my head was drenched in sweat. My hair was dripping, sweat was running into my eyes, and flies were flocking all around me. I could feel my cheeks burning, and guessed they must be red. E. told me something and it was then, as she talked, that I noticed she wasn't remotely out of breath. Not a bead of sweat had broken on her forehead! This is a woman old enough to at least be my mother and I could not believe how much better shape she's in than me. So sad. I don't know why that's sad. Maybe it shouldn't be. But... man! It's times like that I need to remember not to compare myself to other people. And hell, maybe it IS a good idea to put horses in hilly areas. I mean, hiking a mile uphill just to find the horses in the first place is great exercise, after all. It's exhausting as all hell and even a little annoying, but it's great exercise!

Eventually, we got all the gear set up on the horses. We walked them across the street, pulled ourselves up on top of them, and got going. I must say, though, that while I love Heather immensely, she is kind of a pain in the ass when it comes to obeying the word, "Ho." (Hello, googlers!) I said, "Ho, Heather. Heather, HO!" over and over while I loaded up, and with one foot in the stirrup, and the rest of my body mid-air over her back, she started walking away!!! I told her "ho" a thousand more times as I sat down, and finally got her to stop walking. Once she did, I told her to walk, kind of as a reward for stopping in the first place. I just wanted her to get that I need her to listen to my commands, you know?

Anyway, after that little glitch, we set off, and I was immediately taken aback by the sheer beauty of the trail. It was so foresty and green. Tree roots crawled over rocks that were covered in greenish-brown moss. Branches reached out to one another far above our heads. Birds called out, or sat quietly at a distance, and wildflowers sat diminutively at our feet. We passed a resevoir on our trail and saw a flock of white pelicans! I missed seeing a deer up ahead of us, but I did see a squirrel run across our path! I felt so at ease being in the heart of nature like that, and spent quite a lot of time just looking around, enjoying the view as well as the rhythmic rocking of Heather's footsteps beneath me.

Periodically, though, Heather started trotting. Without any command or anything! It was okay, except for when we went downhill. E. didn't want either of them trotting downhill, especially because of Gracie's injury (Gracie was okay riding that day as long as we didn't do any big hills -- fine with me, the girl with the heights phobia!). Trotting turned out to be pretty fun, for the most part. Getting Heather to slow down once she was trotting, or go back to a walk and stay there? That part was difficult. She kept feeling like she was going to take off again at any moment, and I had to remind her over and over to just take it easy and not go too fast. "easy, girl, easy..." Eventually, she'd settle down and then I'd feel better too. She really is a very cool horse.

At one point toward the end of our ride, my stirrup broke! It's a break-away stirrup, with a thick rubberband on the outside, built so that the rider won't get dragged if the horse freaks out, bucks the rider off, and gallops away. My rubberband just snapped, for seemingly no reason. E. didn't have an extra, so she gave me hers, and said she'd walk with Gracie until she could find a place high enough to stand and get back on Gracie. While she was trying to pull the rubberband onto my stirrup, she had Gracie's reins loosely looped over her wrist. Gracie took a couple steps back and stepped right into the part of the reins that were on the ground. She then took another step and all of a sudden, she had her own bridle attached to her back foot via the reins! She tried to get away which resulted in her spinning in circles! First E. tried to go to her, then stepped back saying, "We'll have to let it snap. It's supposed to just snap." But it didn't snap! We told Gracie, "Ho," but she kept spinning. I kept saying calm things to Heather, so that Gracie wouldn't spook her. Eventually, Gracie DID settle down when we'd said, "Ho," enough times to convince her to try it. E. went over and ran her hand down Gracie's leg so that she'd lift her foot. When Gracie did, E. unwrapped the reins from around her hoof, and we praised Gracie so much! After all, Gracie's the one known for not listening, for doing her own thing, for freaking out more easily than Heather. So the fact that she listened and stopped moving and let E. unhook her hoof was HUGE for her. E. finished rubberbanding my stirrup and we moved along, stopping every so often to let the horses graze on their favorite plants. They both deserved it, Gracie for calming down during a panicky situation, and Heather for staying calm while her daughter was freaking out. Good horsies!

E. did find a place to hop back on Gracie, and we rode them the rest of the way back. I was thankful that the saddle didn't dig into my leg at all this time, and that instead of being super hot out, it was actually pretty cool. I liked the cool breezes wrapping around us as we rode. I didn't even have to wear my sweater (which is possibly what caused my cold!)!

We stopped at E.'s car on the way back and loaded their saddles into it. Wearing only their bridles, I had a hard time telling them apart! E. handed me Heather's reins again after I put her saddle away, and we walked them to the base of the hill just inside the gate. After we brushed them, fed them carrots, and picked their hooves, I hugged Heather. I kissed her face and her nose, and she let me. When I scratched her ears, she rubbed her whole face into my body. She was one itchy horse! It tickled and I laughed a lot and hugged and kissed her some more. It was the first time she let me do that, and didn't even seem to mind. She is a sweetheart. "Thanks for a fun ride, Heather," I said as we walked them slightly up the hill, past the second gate. We unhooked their halters, and off they jogged, up the hill to find the rest of their horsie friends.

E. and I walked the rest of the gear back to her car. I went down a tiny hill and promptly fell right on my ass. "Oh no, are you okay?" E. asked. I was, thankfully, even though I really had to pee, and that did NOT help. "And you made it down that huge hill before," E. added. Ah, well. These things happen. At least I had the presence of mind NOT to put my hands out when I fell. Hooray for me -- the lessons from self defense class really are sticking with me!

After loading the rest of the stuff in E.'s car and chatting with her a bit, we hugged and said goodbye. I thanked her for letting me ride with her, and she said she's so glad that I have fun doing it. I'm glad, too. Glad for the opportunity to ride, glad to have fun with E., Heather, and Gracie, and glad to have had horses introduced into my life again. Now I've just got to find some horses when I move to L.A.!