Okay, for the rest of August, I'm going to attempt to keep a Monday-Wednesday-Friday writing schedule. So much is going on that I'm not writing, which is, like, the opposite of what I want to happen! Lots of activity should equal lots of writing! So, that's my writing goal.

I also have fitness goals, but guess what? I figured since fitness, walking, and training for the marathon are becoming such a big chunk of my life, they deserve their own space. So, I am happy to announce - My Marathon Blog!

In other news, my mom already bought plane tickets to come visit me this Christmas! She and Garth are both going to be here. I'm so happy!! They're going to Texas first to see Dad, Derek and Heather, then they're coming here while Derek and Heather visit her parents. It works out wonderfully for everyone! I think Dad and his girlfriend will be spending Christmas with her kids, maybe? And Wyatt and Alyssa will be visiting Alyssa's brother in Columbia, South America, where he teaches English. Wow. I can't believe it's August and my entire family's Christmas plans are already in place! Hee.

As for Thanksgiving, Joe's mom and his sister, Sandy, will be visiting out this way. I think Sandy's husband, Joe S., and their kiddo, Mele, will be here, too, which is super exciting. I love that little girl!

Gosh, maybe I should go ahead and make Halloween plans! Heh.

Anyway, this weekend has been pretty cool. Joe and I have watched a couple episodes of Da Ali G Show, which is completely insane, not to mention hilarious. This guy plays several characters and does interviews with people. With a complete poker face, he says horribly inappropriate things to them. But he asks questions like he really just wants to know and doesn't understand. Meanwhile, the people around him either laugh, or sometimes get incredibly angry! It makes me super uncomfortable to watch! But I still like it, because it makes me laugh. Last night, I thought a priest he was interviewing might punch him in the face. It was crazy! Also, Butros Butros Gali was on and it turns out, he's a pretty funny guy!

We also saw Alien Vs. Predator yesterday, which was awesome. It was suspenseful, creepy, and at times, cheesey enough to be funny! I've seen Alien and Aliens, but not Predator. Joe got it on DVD, though, so I'll probably watch it soon. He described it as "testosterone on screen." Should be interesting to see what he means by that!

And now, a story...

After living here a month, Joe and I finally got a refrigerator! We decided to rent one, since we really think we'll only be here in this apartment until December. Then, we're going to move much closer to his work and my campus. Both of us commuting an hour to and from work/school everyday is already wearing us out. We'll definitely be ready to move when our six month lease is up!

So, we're renting a refrigerator, and it was delivered on Friday afternoon. The delivery guy was funny. First he asked how long I'd been married. When I said, "Two years," he asked, "No babies?" I was like, "Um, NO." Heh. Then he asked if Patches was pregnant! Poor Patches. Poor, chubby Patches. Hehe...

Then the guy installed the fridge, wished me a nice day, and left. Yay, new refrigerator!!

Homer, upon realizing we had a new piece of furniture, immediately scaled it. It was as though he'd been waiting an entire month to look inside the highest cabinets in the house! And that he did! Banging and clanging away, he opened the cabinet then let it fall shut again, over and over, until he eventually got inside. It's what he does. So, needless to say, I was just trying to ignore him while I sat at my computer.

Then I heard a different sound that caught my attention. I whipped my head around to see what he could possibly be doing. I didn't even see him at first. Until he started walking. The plastic sheets over the light bulbs bulged slightly as he walked slowly on top of them. He was INSIDE the lighting area over the kitchen! I laughed, then freaked out. How was I going to get him out of there? More importantly, how did he get in there in the first place?? I stood underneath him, looking at him, trying to figure out the situation, when I heard a crack! I jumped backwards as one huge sheet of plastic came crashing to the floor, along with Homer, narrowly missing me. He took off running down the hallway, while I froze, clutching my hand over my racing heart.

When Joe got home, I showed him the insanity. One little corner had broken off, but the rest of the plastic sheet remained intact. Joe went ahead and put it back. We finally found the hole. It was in the cabinet right next to the cabinet above the fridge. Homer must have reached over there, gotten inside, and climbed up through the hole to get inside the lighting.

Joe and I went into the other side of the apartment as we talked about crazy Homer and other aspects of our day, when suddenly, we heard ANOTHER CRASH!!! This time, when we inspected the madness, there was plastic all over the place. A different sheet had come crashing down during Homer's Great Experiment No. 2. Again, Homer was not hurt. The plastic, on the other hand, was in a few different pieces, and little shards covered the floor. We cleaned it up while Homer remained traumatized and hiding under the safety of our comforter. He stayed there for quite a long time! (By the end of the night, he was his old self again.)

After our trip to Home Depot, we were armed with duct tape and a brand new sheet of plastic. Joe trimmed it with a box cutter to fit correctly. He also cut a piece of the broken sheeting to fit the size of the hole. I climbed on the kitchen counter to tape said piece of plastic over the hole. That, in itself, was no easy feat. I felt like I was going to just freak out up there. I have a seriously warped phobia of heights, but then, that's what a phobia is, right? Irrational fear? I have challenged myself by climbing all sorts of heights, and I really thought I'd come a long way. But I realized that my fear of "small" heights (such as being on top of a kitchen counter!) is far more severe than those of super high heights. It's like, if I fell off a giant building, I'd be guaranteed to die. But if I fell from the top of a kitchen counter, I could break my back, or my leg, or crack my head open and get a horribly painful concussion! I could be paralyzed! I could wake up in a pool of my own blood! IN PAIN! All from falling off a countertop!!!

I actually didn't realize I was as scared as I was until I tried to take a small step over to the side for a minute. My whole body felt like rock; immovable. I started to tell Joe I needed to get down, but when I tried, I felt a lump in my throat. Then I felt really stupid. "It's not a big deal," I tried to tell myself, but it was. And then I couldn't stop the tears. Joe immediately became very worried and asked, "Oh my god, why are crying??" But I knew I couldn't tell him then. I felt like I was on the verge of that completely-freaking-out, anxiety-attack feeling. I suddenly realized that if I could just manage to take a few deep breaths, I could get through it. Because I sure as hell couldn't move or talk. I closed my eyes, which made me feel like I was somewhere else for a little bit. And I took a deep breath. Then another. And another. I opened my eyes and said, "Okay, I'm okay." I wiped my eyes, and Joe asked me again what was wrong. I just shook my head, knowing we'd talk about it more when I got down.

I taped the piece of plastic down successfully. Then I taped a piece of cardboard on top of that. With the magic of duct tape, Homer will never be able to get up there again. And I'll never have to get up there again. God willing!

Joe and I did talk more about my fears once I was on level ground again. He is worried that my phobia is as (apparently) severe as it is, but I don't quite know what to do about it, so I just kind of accept it. At first, I felt upset that I'd gotten that panicked. Like, what about all the work I've done trying to challenge this phobia? What about climbing the Duomo in Florence? Then the bell tower? What about climbing St. Paul's cathedral in London? Or going to the top of the Space Needle? Didn't any of that count for anything? And now I can't stand on a kitchen counter??

But then it occurred to me that I'd actually gotten myself through a potentially severe anxiety attack using the breathing exercises I've worked on for nearly a year now. A few deep breaths was all it took to center myself and get beyond that moment of panic. I did it! I staved off an anxiety attack using the tools I was given last September. All that work has paid off! Realizing that felt like a pretty significant accomplishment and made the doubts in the previous paragraph all fade into the background. I actually have improved in managing my anxiety. And that, my friends, is a really good feeling.

And to think, if Homer hadn't attempted to utterly demolish the kitchen, I may never have known!